One of the possible consequences of my dad losing his job is that we might lose our house.
The thing is, I’m not even going to be living in my house for that much longer. I’m moving to New Hampshire in late summer before I begin graduate school there in September. Even though I’m not going to be living at home, I still want home to where it is, where it always has been. I want my parents to still have the house, and for me to be able to come and visit it. This is the house I grew up in, this is the neighborhood I grew up in, and this is where most of my memories are. Birthday parties, Easter egg hunts in the backyard, Christmas mornings, having “tea” aka milk and donuts in the basement with my sister, my sister forcing herself into my room on Saturday mornings because I had a TV in my room and she didn’t, my sister and me writing on my walls in marker when we really shouldn’t have, me locking my sister down the basement while my mom went to the grocery store because my sister let the power of being in charge go to her head and decided to ground me, the backyard where I would chill with my imaginary friends after school and where later my own human friends would play, proms, homecomings, sledding down the hill beside the house and getting stuck in my neighbor’s flower bush and bravely using army crawling my way out of the bush, my dad taking my sister and me trick-or-treating around the neighborhood, my family and I outside in the backyard carving pumpkins which amounted to every year a reveal of my pathetic pumpkin carving skills, my cousins sleeping over, my grandmother staying with us on Christmas Eve night, playing hide-and-go-seek in the dark with my neighbors a couple of streets up, renting videos from Blockbuster and watching them at home, sitting around the TV in the living room eating dinner, and plugging in this address as “Home” into my GPS, so that no matter where I was I would always have this place to come back to.
Although I’ll be moving in the near future, this house is still an anchor for me as well as for my family. My mom summed about the whole situation perfectly, saying “It would be one thing if I was choosing to move, but being forced to is another thing.”
We don’t know how things will go in terms of the house, but for now we are preparing for the worst which means slowly saying goodbye to the house.